What is it that I am feeling now?Is it frustration,sadness,worry?...I really don't know..
It is just a feeling that invades me at times and leaves me with wide open eyes,staring in the air...It increases my heart rate and my core temperature,then I self consciously interrupt it and jot down some words describing it,as I am doing now...It is an idea or more that hang in my brain,trying to get out from the subconscious to consciousness to become clear,well formed and will try to translate into actions if allowed by the rest of the brain neurons...
I had a meeting yesterday and it was interesting..I usually leave meetings numb and electrified by the negative impulses I sense,but this time,I left neutral even with hopes and it was a positive thing...
I left and chatted with a colleague and we were really supportive of each other.We had the same concerns and we were going to help each other succeed...And then, I realized that it was definitely not yesterday disguised in today...and that I should not fear that yesterday is going to haunt me again,revisit me with all its unfairness,all its sorrow ,all its negativity...It is a new page,with new people.
No matter how successful an entity was one papers,based on data and pointers...based on numbers and statistics,it is not sufficient enough...What is unmeasured,its spirit,its colors and the people who make it happen is more important..
I woke up this morning and was going to dwell on my misfortune,on all the hardships I went through,and still have to endure,mainly living apart from the people I love...I woke up very early,grabbed the phone and spoke with my mom,on the other end of the earth...I tried to control my voice and not burst into tears..I just wanted to make sure that my parents were fine...and she was.My mother was back to her life and to her routine and that made me feel better.
Talking with others helps so much,laughing,sharing and just being positive and hopeful of tomorrow make the sun shine after the storm...
I need sunshine in my life and no matter how hard things are,I will make sure that I will keep on moving forward...What matters is what I want and how hard I am going to work to make it happen...and I will make it happen for me,now,at this moment,at present...No one can stop the sunshine and the rainbows in my life..
Wishing all a very good day,lots of blessings and positive thoughts...
Love,
Roula.
It is just a feeling that invades me at times and leaves me with wide open eyes,staring in the air...It increases my heart rate and my core temperature,then I self consciously interrupt it and jot down some words describing it,as I am doing now...It is an idea or more that hang in my brain,trying to get out from the subconscious to consciousness to become clear,well formed and will try to translate into actions if allowed by the rest of the brain neurons...
I had a meeting yesterday and it was interesting..I usually leave meetings numb and electrified by the negative impulses I sense,but this time,I left neutral even with hopes and it was a positive thing...
I left and chatted with a colleague and we were really supportive of each other.We had the same concerns and we were going to help each other succeed...And then, I realized that it was definitely not yesterday disguised in today...and that I should not fear that yesterday is going to haunt me again,revisit me with all its unfairness,all its sorrow ,all its negativity...It is a new page,with new people.
No matter how successful an entity was one papers,based on data and pointers...based on numbers and statistics,it is not sufficient enough...What is unmeasured,its spirit,its colors and the people who make it happen is more important..
I woke up this morning and was going to dwell on my misfortune,on all the hardships I went through,and still have to endure,mainly living apart from the people I love...I woke up very early,grabbed the phone and spoke with my mom,on the other end of the earth...I tried to control my voice and not burst into tears..I just wanted to make sure that my parents were fine...and she was.My mother was back to her life and to her routine and that made me feel better.
Talking with others helps so much,laughing,sharing and just being positive and hopeful of tomorrow make the sun shine after the storm...
I need sunshine in my life and no matter how hard things are,I will make sure that I will keep on moving forward...What matters is what I want and how hard I am going to work to make it happen...and I will make it happen for me,now,at this moment,at present...No one can stop the sunshine and the rainbows in my life..
Wishing all a very good day,lots of blessings and positive thoughts...
Love,
Roula.
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